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# You Vill Enjoy Ze Bugs Raw
- URL: https://goodoil.news/you-vill-enjoy-ze-bugs-raw/
- Published: 2023-07-25T04:00:00.000Z
- Updated: 2023-07-24T04:23:39.000Z
- Author: Cam Slater
- Tags: AUS Politics, Health, Sport, #wp, #wp-post, #Import 2024-07-16 22:22

What is it with the totalitarian mindset that is so obsessed with “health”? In the 1930s, the Nazis and Fascists were obsessed with a cult of the athletic body, which they forced on the public through such state-run programs as *Gemeinschaft Kraft durch Freude* (“Strength Through Joy”). The Soviets, too, had *Dinamo* (“Power in Motion”), the State Political Directorate Physical Culture society and the Children and Youth Sport Schools.

In its turn, Maoist China was synonymous with mass public exercise regimes — now making a comeback under Xi, with the Beijing General Workers’ Union mandating collective exercise programs for the city’s workers.

Not to be outdone, the Little Dictators of a Melbourne council are setting up their own Strength Through Joy regime.

> In a new health push, deep-fried ‘dimmies’ and chips are on the outer at Greater Dandenong Council’s sports canteens and kitchens.  
>  
> Built-in oil fryers are being gradually phased out as council’s sports pavilions are upgraded.  
>  
> Clubs have also been banned from using freestanding benchtop deep fryers under new pavilion-hire agreements.  
>  
> [Dandenong Star Journal](https://dandenong.starcommunity.com.au/news/2023-06-05/deep-fried-food-ban/?ref=goodoil.news)

As you can imagine, footy fans are not exactly dancing with joy at the thought of snacking on a kale salad or rice cake while the boys kick around the pigskin.

![](https://storage.ghost.io/c/31/f4/31f4e20a-0315-499e-83ff-139e8eab53bf/content/images/wp-content/uploads/2023/07/the_bfd_eatzebugsfootyedition.jpg)

They’re only thinking of your health. The BFD. Photoshop by Lushington Brady.

> Football fans in Victoria’s south-east have lashed a proposal to ban deep fryers in a bid to push healthy eating \[…\]  
>  
> “Deep fried food is a footy food, that’s why you go to the footy, to get your chips and your dim sims and stuff like that,” one woman said.  
>  
> “I definitely eat greasy on a Saturday morning, so please keep the deep fried chips and potato cakes and all that,” another woman said.  
>  
> One fan even went so far as to say the proposed ban was not the Australian way.  
>  
> “Everyone loves their chips and gravy at the footy on a winter’s day,” one man said.  
>  
> “It’d be a bit like having no beer at the footy, it’s un-Australian”.

Jesus, don’t even mention beer. You’ll only start giving them ideas. Get ready to choose between mineral water (unflavoured, of course!), kombucha, or herbal tea.

> The Greater Dandenong Council is proposing to phase out deep-fried foods, with a switch to air fryers as council facilities are upgraded.

As anyone whose tried to fit one of those behemoths in the kitchen knows, air fryers, whatever their merits, take up a whole lot of kitchen real estate for very little return in food quantity.

Now, try and imagine whipping up enough chips to satisfy the queue at the clubhouse window.

> Local sporting clubs, including Doveton Football and Netball Club, believe the move could affect their revenue and fundraising.  
>  
> “You can only do a cup or two of chips in an air fryer at a time, where we can do possibly 10 to 12 cups at a time in two baskets in a deep fryer,” **Debby Henwood** from the club said.

> “Bugger off, in a polite way”  
>  
> **Debby Henwood**, Doveton Football and Netball Club

The healthy eating commissars are undeterred by such counter-revolutionary reactionaries, though.

> Greater Dandenong mayor **Eden Foster** said there are many healthier ways to cook that are still quick.  
>  
> “Ultimately what we want is for healthy options to be available for our community,” Foster said.  
>  
> [9News](https://www.9news.com.au/national/dandenong-council-deep-fryer-ban-victoria-news-locals-sports-clubs-reaction/24e7f670-87ab-47e6-8928-2b1c24aa2650?ref=goodoil.news)

Yes, there’s cricket meal, cricket and mealworm chocolate (carob, of course), and, for the kiddies, real ant candy.

Doesn’t that sound doubleplusgood, comrades?

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