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Sometimes, the heroes you need are the heroes you didn’t know you needed. Whether it’s the anti-vaxxer challenging dictatorial lockdowns in court, or sleazy porn kings defending freedom of speech. Or US states that are usually only remembered as punch-lines.

It’s said that when Custer faced his last stand, he reassured his men by saying, “Well, at least we don’t have to go back through Nebraska”.

But Nebraska is standing up and doing us all proud, with “Meat on the Menu Day”.

Nebraska Gov. Pete Ricketts railed Monday against a proclamation by the governor of neighboring Colorado that encourages people to avoid meat for one day a week, calling it a “direct attack on our way of life” and signing a pro-meat declaration of his own.

Ricketts surrounded himself with top officials from Nebraska’s meat, agricultural and restaurant industries as he declared Saturday “Meat on the Menu Day” in Nebraska. The day was chosen to coincide with Colorado’s “MeatOut Day,” a nonbinding proclamation signed by Gov. Jared Polis late last month and backed by an animal rights group.

Those weed-smoking, carbon-spewing bourgeois bohemians in Aspen can keep their lentil burgers – Nebraskans may be called cornhuskers, but their real trade is meat. And they’re gonna have their meat, goldurnit.

“That is a direct attack on our way of life here in Nebraska,” Ricketts, a Republican, said at a news conference in an Omaha meat shop.

Nebraska Department of Agriculture Director Steve Wellman said agriculture supports one out of every four jobs in state and generates $21 billion each year. Meat products alone generate about $12 billion annually, and the industry has continued to grow, he said.

“When agriculture does well, Nebraska does well,” Wellman said. “Agriculture is the heart and soul of Nebraska, and our 45,700 farm and ranch families keep our state going year after year.”

Yahoo! News

Vegan activists tried to protest, but they were too weak and emaciated to get across the border. Let alone face off against a bunch of protein-rich, bulked up farmboys.

Meantime, if I can’t move to Nebraska, I’ll be bringing the Nebraska home in the form of a good, old, juicy rib-eye.

Enjoy your kale, vegans.

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