They breed us different in Australia, that’s for sure.
We’ve got the World’s Most Aussie Interview. We’ve got heroes who bring down terrorist murderers with cafe chairs and milk crates. We’ve got deadset mulleted legends who eat KFC Zinger boxes in front of vegan protesters.
We used to say “Only in America…”, but we eventually realised that that was mostly “Only in Florida…” “Florida Man” became such a notorious headline starter, that The Adventures of Florida Man got its own animated web series.
Well, Australia has its own “Florida”, and it’s not the Serial Killer Central, Adelaide: it’s Far North Queensland.
Face it, when a place is a handy euphemism for the F-word, “interesting” things are bound to happen there.
Like beer-swilling, shirtless lawnmower thieves…
Police have released a video for the public to help to identify a man who stole a ride-on mower for a joy ride, making the world’s slowest getaway — beer in hand — in Cairns in Far North Queensland.
The crime was a masterpiece of improvisation.
Senior Constable Heidi Marek said the man and his female companion pulled up on the side of a road to speak with the 63-year-old owner of the ride-on, who was mowing his lawn at the time.
“He told the owner he wanted to purchase a similar mower for a family member and asked if he could take the mower for a test drive,” Senior Constable Marek said.
“The owner has agreed but became suspicious after seeing the mower head off down the street.
“He was expecting him to turn around and when that didn’t happen, he chased him on foot but couldn’t catch him.”
It was hardly the world’s fastest getaway, but still…
Security vision released by police shows a bare-chested man in a red hat cruising down the side of the road during the incident, earlier this month.
The man’s female companion, realising her partner had done a cut and run, drove off in their car in the opposite direction.
Senior Constable Marek said while the lawnmower was later found in a ditch, the story was not yet over.
“We are still looking for the offender, as well as the keys to the mower,” she said.
ABC Australia
Truly, a cunning plan.
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