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What started a week ago on 25 May as a tragedy with the death of George Floyd in Minneapolis, has reached its logical end point with a protest march in Auckland, New Zealand. Mr Floyd was allegedly strangled by a knee to the throat from a Democrat policeman, in the Democrat city of Minneapolis, in a state that has been Democrat since Pol Pot was a Democrat in Kampuchea.
The Democrat Mayor of Minneapolis, stated today after meeting the Minnesota Democrat Governor, and the five Minnesota Democrat Congressional Representatives and two Minnesota Democrat Senators, that “it is terrible and tragic that this happened in my city but we will not rest until the blame has been squarely placed on a Republican… probably the President… but we haven’t decided yet… but there is an election coming up… so that would probably be the best truth to construct.”
When asked where the three Republican Congressional Representatives were the Minneapolis Mayor said “What? There are Republicans in Minnesota?”
Trump, in retaliation, declared Antifa a terrorist organisation. This was because Antifa were making contributions to the Democrat election campaign by burning down Democrat neighbourhoods in protest.
What is Antifa? Glad you asked. Antifa is an anti-fascist fascist organisation that believes in peace and equality and that these objectives can be achieved by violence and burning down the cities they live in. Plus, the black shirts and masks are cool, like real fascists. Though it’s kind of last month, since because of Covid everyone wears masks now. So best just to burn something, because that would be cool, and very this month, and there is an election there in six months.
This all led to a reinvigoration of the #BlackLivesMatter movement which started during the presidency of Democrat Barack Obama, but minus the torching of whole cities, because he was a Democrat and the election had already been.
Someone, though we don’t know who, as they have been eliminated by the thought police used “#All LivesMatter” which really triggered some green-haired little popstar who responded by saying “IT’S NOT ALL ABOUT YOU. LET ME TELL YOU ALL ABOUT ME AND WHAT I THINK” #GreenLivesMatter.
Taika Waititi joined in by tweeting a video encouraging people to be more constructive, to which commentators responded by stating “Don’t tell us how to be black, that’s Joe Biden’s job” #You’reNotOneOfUs
Which all obviously and logically leads to a US political football becoming a New Zealand thing, because we want to be cool. Well, the Prime Ninnyster wants to be cool, and very this month, and there is an election here in three months.
So, plans were made for a march to be held on 1 June, in Auckland New Zealand. ACT’s David Seymour pointed out that while he thought we shouldn’t be in Level 2 at all, as we had one Covid case (a guy named Bob living in Grafton), but that since we are still in Level 2 all marchers on the 1st should have been fined.
This was ignored by the Prime Ninnyster who called Seymour a “poopy pants” and said that he was “fake news” because “the guy’s name isn’t even Bob, and no way would he be allowed to live in a Labour suburb!”. However Dr Siouxsie Wiles New Zealand’s most pink haired microbiologist said it would be “ok, so long as no one with even mild Covid symptoms attended, and that while she initially said a two metre gap was fine, what she meant was a twenty seven metre gap was needed, which in practice is now a two centimetre gap for the march” #PinkLivesMatter.
At this point Taika Waititi weighed in again calling Dr Wiles a racist for culturally appropriating a First Nation American tribal name. He then consoled himself by watching reruns of movies he made, like the James Bond story he appropriated from the British, and one about a Norse god, Thor, he appropriated from a guy named Snorri Sturluson.
Protesters have called for the Prime Ninnyster to condemn the policemen responsible for the death of Mr Floyd saying “the silence has been deafening, we are used to daily pandemic reports but now we need some other reason to worship at your feet, or at least hear that reassuring ‘disappointed teacher’ voice you do so well. Anything to distract us from the over 37,000 extra unemployed, the worse economic downturn in 160 years and a surging suicide rate. All that is Donald Trump’s fault anyway because the news told us so”
On the other hand, when this week becomes last week it could be that next week is the big news now.
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