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Satire
The multi-award-winning social vaccinologist Dr Aymer Freeguy has just released the results of some groundbreaking research in which he finally answers the most pressing question regarding the pandemic in New Zealand.
In his epic work entitled ‘A Safe and Effective Vaccine against Fascism’, Dr Freeguy concludes that the most effective treatment is to immediately eradicate the principal vectors of the disease.
Dr Freeguy found that eradication of the primary vectors would also provide protection against the other strains of the disease, Marxism and Totalitarianism. These variants have been identified as being only 3.76% dissimilar and thus would be very effectively prevented by eradicating the vectors identified in the study.
These primary vectors, the Ardern, Bloomfield, Hipkins, Davis and Woods organisms, are the main carriers of this virulent disease and need to be neutralised without delay. But numerous secondary vectors have also been identified. Of these, the Seymour is probably the main secondary threat and it has the added capability of taking on different forms and thus camouflaging itself at will.
A full list of primary and secondary vectors together with recommended actions is included in the body of the report; however, just by reading the executive summary, it becomes clear that this infection has also spread widely throughout the country’s corporate, bureaucratic and media institutions. Thus, neutralising these secondary carriers is seen to be an important part of the cleaning process once the main eradication task has been completed.
For further information, readers can download the full report in pdf format from:
www.letsstopthisshit.org
