Colonial-Virus Outbreak at Wellington Newspaper

The Wellington daily rag has a new outbreak of Colonial-virus. It’s become an epidemic in the diseased tabloid. They should shut the whole thing down and quarantine it until everybody within the facility’s infected community gets over it, and themselves.

Today’s wretched ‘feature’ effort is authored by yet another varsity nong, almost certainly writing for free, whose ‘story’ [a fairy-tale par effluence] is introduced by this informed illustration:

Yes, dear, Abel Tasman was “one of the first Europeans to land in New Zealand”. Good grief. But, I’m sorry to report, that’s the actual factual highlight, it’s all downhill from there. The article is titled, can you believe it:

Begging ‘what has colonialism ever done for us’ it’s more ridiculous than the famous Monty Python sketch as the writer interviews her keyboard, her navel, and her “Facebook friends” (yes, really) to try to understand her unmitigated maladroitness with reality in post-colonial context and the result is, of course, pure tosh. Absolute bloody rubbish.

The thing, I won’t stretch the truth by referring to it as a newspaper, is a sad, bitter joke. A morose parody of its former self. An insult, literally, to its readers.

The lights will go out at the waste-dump of human resources, that’s for sure, one way or another, and soon.

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