Advice
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I accidentally swallowed a bunch of scrabble tiles. My next trip to the toilet could spell disaster!
Before surgery, my anaesthetist offered me a couple of different options. He could either knock me out with gas, or he could do it with a large wooden boat paddle. It was an ether/oar proposition.
Two cowboys were wandering the desert, lost and starving. Finally, in the distance they see a tree draped in bacon.”Look!”, says one cowboy. “It’s a bacon tree, we’re saved!”He runs to the tree but is suddenly shot down in a hail of bullets. With his dying breath, he says, “Stay back! It’s not a bacon tree, it’s a ham bush.”
