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Exciting New Olympic Event

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Sir Bob Jones
nopunchespulled.com

The Olympic Games, once a highlight in the sporting calendar, as with all individual sports, have now become corrupted by excess.

With the Olympics this constitutes adding ever more events, in the process diluting the value of an Olympic medal. Such is the way of the modern world.

Given that, here’s a suggestion for a new Olympic event, in which New Zealand could clean up both the gold and silver. That’s high speed head-nodding when listening to someone talking.

In that respect rugby commentators Jeff Wilson and Kirsty Stanaway would whack all likely competition.

A mate of mine produced a stop-watch so we could time them. We did this as first impressions suggest Jeff is the supremo but I noted Kirsty’s head nod travels a shorter distance, and so it proved.

Jeff nods his head on average 115 times during one minute’s listening to the reply to one of his questions whereas Kirsty twice cracked 125 nods by her shorter nod ploy. Plainly rules would be necessary to ensure fairness. For example, contestants could wear a necklace with a large block hanging beneath their chin to overcome time-wasting deep nods. At the bottom of each nod their chin must touch this block which would be electronically devised to record a correct nod.

In the years ahead this event could become the equivalent of the four minute mile which up until Roger Bannister first cracked it seven decades ago, was thought beyond human capability.

The question would be, who could first break the 200 head nods in the prescribed minute’s listening?


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