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Coughlan Spins a Web on Poll Numbers

selective focus photography of spiderweb
Photo by Nicolas Picard. The BFD.

The spurious 1News Verian Poll produced results of orgasmic heights of delight to journalists on the left. Maiki Sherman appeared briefly to swap her priceless Maori heritage for Irish as she jigged around our television screens while spouting as much blarney as she could think of. It was an infantile example of just how far the standard of journalism in this country has sunk. One News is the leader in this exercise of blatant bias and mischief, with Stuff and others of the mainstream media not far behind. Thomas Coughlan is another who no doubt found the results of the poll to his liking.

However, two other polls, both using the same methodology, produced very different results. Thomas would have found the results of the Roy Morgan Poll hard to digest and the Taxpayers Union Curia poll probably had him searching for the Gaviscon bottle. Chamomile tea’s calming effect might have helped Thomas in his time of need. Something must have worked because he plucked up the courage to write about the Taxpayers Union-Curia poll in the Weekend Herald. Was there bias? Surely not.

Not being one to give the ‘far right’ any plaudits for being conclusively on the winning end of the results, Thomas got out his best silk, a natural fibre made of protein, and started to spin the results in a web of intrigue, not to attract flies, but rather those supporting the far left of politics. Sitting in his parlour he commenced to write a silky piece that, while not inaccurate, was persuasively to the left. To be fair, his headline was accurate: ‘Latest poll reveals good news for govt’. However, Thomas was not about to have us believe this was normal or indeed the start of a trend. No, no.

He started by saying the government has been given a reprieve in the latest Taxpayers Union-Curia poll. Take that you far right wingers! Reading between the lines, Thomas is inferring this is an aberration for the government in a string of poor polls. He says it follows two other bad polls which showed support for the coalition falling to the point where there would be a change of government. So there is good news for the left despite the odd poll like this one.

Thomas goes on to say the good news for the right is tempered by the fact that this latest poll shows a fairly large increase in support for Labour and static support for National and NZ First. Note that Thomas has managed to bring further good news for his leftie comrades. He then goes on to give the results saying Labour has charged ahead by 4.3 points to 30 per cent while the Greens have ‘plummeted‘ (that’s a bit harsh on your friends, Thomas) 4.4 points to 10.2 per cent. A close look at those numbers suggests nothing more than a rearranging of the deck chairs on the Titanic.

Thomas alerts us to the fact that National leader Chris Luxon’s net favourability was up 15 points to +8 per cent. Notice the bias. Labour up 4.3 was charging ahead but Luxon up 15 was apparently nothing to write home about. Winston Peters went up by 13 points but again obviously not of real interest. These journalists seem to think we are stupid, that we can’t read between the lines, that their bias is so cleverly hidden we can’t see it. They need to think again.

The truth is that both the Roy Morgan poll and the Taxpayers Union-Curia poll use the same methodology for basically the same results and therefore the indisputable fact is the government is on the right track and doing overall what those who voted for them elected them to do. No amount of silky spin can belie or belittle that point. The polls since the election have pretty much favoured the coalition Government and should continue to do so for the foreseeable future. Long may it reign.

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