Gordon Lightfoot | National
whakatakitimes.nz
Warning
Satire
Laura and Sam McKenzie have done their duty as true believers in the Ardern regime today, as they taught their son Arlo, 4, all about the significance of Matariki.
The parents, who are currently working at the Ministry of Education as policy advisors, were keen to pass on the knowledge they had learnt at a recent staff “cultural competence” training.
Laura, 33, told our reporters that it’s about time that we all started treating Matariki with the respect it deserves, because it is now a holiday for “all people of Aotearoa”.
“It’s our job to educate our son about the significance of Matariki, the Maori new year, because we have been gifted the knowledge from our employer, Te Tahuhu o te Matauranga.
“At our mahi, we took a whole day on Thursday to learn about the star cluster and what it means to each of our unique identities. We decorated the whole Kauri conference room and even had hangi for lunch!” explained the mother-of-one excitedly.
“We had a competition with some of the other ministries and Jacinda said that our celebration decorations were the best!” she exclaimed, brimming with pride.
To teach their son Arlo about Matariki, Sam and Laura helped him to draw stars on cardboard, cut them out and decorate them with silver glitter. Next they were going to start hanging the stars from strings in sequence like a mobile.
“Well, yeah we were about to attach the stars to the string…” said Sam McKenzie, scratching his head “…but then Arlo grabbed the stars, jumped up on the couch screaming ‘NINJA!’ and started throwing the stars at the cat”.
“SAM! Don’t tell them that!” hissed Laura, shooting daggers at her husband from her eyeballs. “What if Jacinda finds out!?”
Laura explained that their whanau was on a journey to fully comprehend the spirit of Matariki.
