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Satire
I couldn’t help noticin’ that the RED QUEEN has been ‘ INCREDIBLY SULKY’ lately.
Last week it was STUFF-UPS at the border for NOT ENOUGH testing, this week it is STUFF-UPS in West and South Auckland for TOO MUCH testing.
I have my suspicions that the last one is stage-managed because they can’t be that stupid can they?
They avoided all enquires on the veracity of the targeted testing from the ‘FERALD’ for 20 hours.
The STUFF-UP was only revealed by the RED QUEEN when asked at her Sunday 1pm Stand Up.
By this time the ‘TARGETED’ ones had been in testing queues for hours unnecessarily.
Then again this made up for empty testing stations prior to the weekend. It looks better for the RED QUEEN if we are all panicking and taking a test. Her and her courtiers must have been bending over in mirth at the sight of it, as none of them protested in the 20 hours when they could have.
Elvis Presley on the phonograph says it all with his song ‘SUSPICIOUS MINDS’.
“We can’t go on together,
With suspicious minds,
(With suspicious minds)
And we can’t build our dreams,
On suspicious minds.”
Another one of his is ‘SUSPICION’ on the same theme.
“Suspicion torments my heart,
Suspicion keeps us apart,
Suspicion why torture me?”
GREEN-EYED GANG
As MAGIC JUNKET (Plunket) said GENTLEMAN JAMES (Shaw) has scored an own goal while he has been in a school daze.
EMMERSON the cartoonist at the ‘ FERALD’ had him digging his own grave. Is this what they call a ‘shovel ready’ project?
FAR-OUT (Farrar) said he had ‘Greenmailed’ the RED QUEEN.
I can see though why he strong-armed the government for the chump change of less than $12m as the CHAMELEON (Peters) had scarpered off with $1bn. It was a case of political brinkmanship.
The CHAMELEON would never be daft enough to incorporate a crystal garden, or talking to angels in the fifth dimension into his schemes. Though there were quite a few dead seedlings.
CLAIRE to be CLEAR (Trevitt) said ‘Sorry was not the hardest word’ and that GENTLEMAN JAMES had said it six times.
The TWERK (Seymour) said it was ‘outrageous’ that GENTLEMAN JAMES had been thrown by the Comrades under the School Bus.
Anyway no love lost between the CHAMELEON and GENTLEMAN JAMES. One was calling the other “woke pixie dust” and the other retorted with “agent of chaos”.
I had to of course get some political capital out of this and upbraid GENTLEMAN JAMES who seems to have been dropped in it by leaked emails. Is the RED QUEEN running Black Ops? Someone is.
SHOOT FROM THE HIP (Hipkins) said it was a ‘WIN’ for the Greens. Sarcasm anyone?
Apparently he wasn’t there when the deal was signed off, but SHANE Jones was and said it was ‘a pig in a poke’ and ideological tyranny.
FRINGE GANGS:
ADVANCE ANDREA (Vance) on NATION did not know that BILLY THE KID’s (Billy Te Kahika’s) party NZPP was registered.
Does ‘STUFF’ not know the basics?
His party is registered with ADVANCE NZ. There should have been a clue for her in the name. Vance! get it?
We have to watch BILLY THE KID as he gets twice as many views as us.
His last live post on Fb got 146,000 views.
That was the one where FIX-IT(Woods) said vaccinations would be compulsory for returning Kiwis.
But SHOOT FROM THE HIP has jumped in to head off BILLY THE KID and said there won’t be Compulsory COVID-19 vaccinations.
The MEMES are running AMUCK!
I’m waiting for someone to do the ‘ TWO WONGS DON’T MAKE A RIGHT’ one.
Don’t mistake Novichok for sugar in your tea!
Just 40 days to trade PUNCHES till we win.
Yi ha!
Here’ lookin’ at you Kid (ARDERN)
Down the hatch,
PUNCH and JUDY
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