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Christopher Luxon

Cartoon: a giant Winston Peters looms over a TV studio boxing ring holding a bell and a scorecard while tiny Christopher Luxon and Chris Hipkins square off below.

Neither Chris Gets to Decide

Winston Peters says Luxon and Hipkins will not decide this election and the media is still running it like first past the post. Two more Chris-on-Chris debates are booked. The kingmaker is the story nobody is billing.

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Cartoon: Qiulae Wong eagerly dials a phone while Christopher Luxon hides behind a memo reading Ruled Out and peeks sideways at a ringing red phone marked Q.

Luxon Will Pick Up the Phone

Luxon has ruled out Opportunity, but he never said he wouldn’t take the call. On current polling the overhang strategy is the only way to keep Opportunity out and the coalition in.

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Cartoon: Christopher Luxon and a bald Chris Hipkins tug over a single comb in a parliamentary lobby while David Seymour leans on a pillar, arms folded, smirking.

Reality Wants Its Money Back

David Seymour has called the government’s path to surplus “heroic”, four days before National shows its fiscal plan. When the junior partner says that about your books, believe him.

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Cartoon: Christopher Luxon and Chris Hipkins stand glum at a National List Lift marked Out of Order while anonymous figures scramble through an Overhang door.

Three Polls Say Split Your Vote

Tuesday’s three polls all show the majors bleeding to the minors. Neither Chris is liked. National’s list lift is a forlorn hope. Electorate National or best candidate; party vote ACT or NZ First.

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Cartoon: Christopher Luxon in a bathroom reaches for a bottle labelled Desperation beside a paper showing National 28 percent

Desperation Is a Stinky Cologne

Key says it will be tight getting Willis, Bishop, Goldsmith and Brownlee home. About 125,000 extra party votes for just one list MP, only if National holds 39 electorates. When the scare is Laws and Henry, panic is a confession.

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Quick Hit

Quick Hit: Own It, Both Of You

National pledges a digital trans-Tasman trial before the 2028 T20 World Cup. Hipkins says he and Albanese agreed it in 2023. Luxon says you need National to get things done. The row is about credit, not caution. Own it, both of you.

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Cartoon: Chris Hipkins brands Split Your Vote an absolute rort on one side while leaving a Te Pati Maori pathway open on the other

Hipkins the Hypocrite

Hipkins called Harry Mowbray’s split-vote campaign an absolute rort by wealthy entrenched interests. Under MMP an overhang is a feature, not a loophole. Chippy only hates it when his mates aren’t running it. If it is absolute fraud, rule Te Pāti Māori out. He will not.

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Cartoon: Melissa Lee jogs past a closed National cabinet door toward the Mt Albert finish line

One Point In Mt Albert

Spinoff-Curia has Helen White on 33 and Melissa Lee on 32 in Mt Albert. Eighteen votes decided it in 2023. ACT and NZ First should clear the field for Lee. Every National electorate win without a list seat is another box for Willis, Bishop and Goldsmith.

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Cartoon: Christopher Luxon stands alone at an empty airport baggage carousel with no staff in sight, watching two blue suitcases marked with ticks go round.

The Insanely Stupid Idea Is Two Ticks Blue

Greens on a record 16 per cent, National and Labour stuck on 28 per cent and Luxon calls the overhang an ‘insanely stupid idea’. The stupid idea is sticking with two ticks blue while the polls sink.

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