John Black
We’re Still the Wokest Country on Earth
That a New Zealand MP could advocate for views so inimical to our history, economy and culture is not perhaps surprising given the ‘diversity’ of our MMP system.
How to Hack the Haka
We need to get the Ministry of Culture to fund some kind of dance development project.
10 Hīkoi I’d Like to See
The right to protest is a virtue of our political system and hīkoi are a peculiarly New Zealand variation. I’d just like to recommend that Māori, rather than wasting such efforts on a dead-on-arrival parliamentary bill, save it for things that really matter…
Making It All About Trump
No doubt as the more well-to-do streets of America witness an epidemic of lefty head explosions, amongst the ranting and wailing a question may be discerned: ‘What did we do wrong?’ You made it all about Trump.
Totally Believable Reasons He Shouldn’t Be President
I would like to offer my services as a writer of anti-Trump hit pieces. I feel I could do a much better job.
What’s in Auckland Uni’s Compulsory Treaty Course?
I have managed to obtain a copy of the final exam.
They Are Useful Idiots and Bloody Fools
The actions of the useful idiots cannot be excused by their blood or religious ties. They act out of ignorance or, worse, a mob mentality that abdicates moral or political decision-making to whatever will get them the most likes on social media.
The Enemies of David Seymour
He remains pleasant and grins cheerfully as they call him a racist white supremacist and baby murderer to his face. This makes them hate him even more. It’s an excellent strategy.
A Guide to Political Assassination
An attempt on Donald Trump’s life was made by the Frank Spencer of hitmen. Contrast this with the excellence of the Israelis and their exploding pagers.
The Good and Bad Pop Stars
Add to this their working-class roots and their lack of interest in ‘issues’ that stars like Swift profess to care about and the reason for Oasis’ pariah status becomes clear.
Yes, Hitler Was the Bad Guy
Never before in the field of human knowledge has so much been unknown by so many.
The ‘Seriously Offensive’ Kupe Beer Drinking Game
The game ends when the players are so drunk that all racial hypersensitivity has been banished by the liberating power of liquor and, ironically, a sober view on ‘cultural offensiveness’ has been restored.
How to Improve the Police
Findings and recommendations of the Inquiry into Equity and Fairness in Policing.
The Power of Kindness: the Jacinda Ardern Story
An exclusive excerpt from her upcoming autobiography.
How to Fix the Olympics
Fortunately, employing the mature reflection and original thinking I am known for, I’ve come up with six ways of fixing future games.