An elderly Pākehā man with a walker had the temerity to ask, “Is there a post office near here?” as if a proud Māori man such as myself only exists to give him street directions! This is the kind of micro-aggression us Māori have to put up with on a daily basis.
So yet again we need to tighten our belts. Trouble is, if I tighten mine any further I risk cutting off blood to my nether regions – and all my best stuff is down there.
In a desperate attempt to wring comedy from tragedy, I’ve examined the type of slurs used to put a target on the back of conservatives and then I’ve translated them into something approaching plain English.
Last Saturday night at an undisclosed Wellington location, our pollies held a boozy bacchanal to decide who was the number one political cosplayer. Prizes were given and competition was fierce.
Using a devilishly clever method (lemon-juice invisible ink), Luxon has been sending his advice in letter form without detection by the world’s press. Luckily, I too was once a boy scout.
I concede Jepsen’s point that New Zealand children should be reading something that reflects their culture and is relevant to their daily lives. So, I have come up with some scenarios for children’s books that might be recognisable for Kiwi kids in 2025.
When the majority Pākehā culture is spurned and a focus placed on ‘indigenous’ Māori culture and recently imported minorities, the assimilation of immigrants to a national identity becomes impossible.
Any extension of the franchise should be a matter of mature consideration. Or, as is my preference, a matter of mockery, abuse and hysterical worse-case scenarios.
It’s not just popular music that has lost its rebellious male mojo. Film and TV are in almost total obeisance to the ‘message’ stifling creativity. The multiplexes are now home to retreads and rethinks and often swap out male energy for the feminine version.
Such guerrilla action is the only way we’ll fight those who want to drag us all back to the era before 1769.
The reaction from the left has been predictably terrible with #IstandwithIran trending on social media. In an attempt to understand this apparent paradox (among others) in lefty foreign policy thinking, I approached an expert.
If only all this had happened in an age of decorum and sobriety, back when people wrote letters…
Clothes maketh the woman, but only apparently if they are madeth in the right placeth.
Political reporters battle with their keyboards. They also have to battle for attention which is why, late at night after a few too many glasses of cab sav, they can fire off mean little diatribes.
