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Finance Ministers Grant Robertson and James Shaw announced today the building of mega money-printing works which will cover a thousand hectares. It has been designed by a phalanx of architects, engineers, environmental consultants and Iwi representatives to the highest specifications and costs possible.
Grant Robertson said, “It is part of our ‘Let’s Get Moving initiative and will be situated in the far North, on land leased from the local Iwi, providing a tidy ‘couch’ income for them while creating sustainable jobs for over a thousand printing staff working 24/7.”
“It will obviously be self-funding as we can print the money to pay for it. The whole project will be a cornerstone of our let’s get moving, shovel ready projects, providing a massive amount of jobs including a large fleet of trucks to get the printed money out into the community”, he said.
James Shaw said, “It is part of the Greens’ and Jacinda’s strategy to give everyone a living wage by making them all billionaires – we will be on the right side of history”.
He also said “it will also be a huge export earner as countries world wide will soon be needing massive amounts of money printed to prop up their collapsed economies.”
He had been tasked with making the newly printed money carbon neutral. It will be printed with water-based inks on a biodegradable paper which will turn to compost within days of being circulated – very progressive green thinking, a world first and applauded in news outlets all around the world.
National spokesperson Nikki Kay said she thought it was a fabulous idea but National would take it further and establish a money printing works in every city in Aotearoa.
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